Saturday, January 11, 2014


Many things in Life are a battle and the mind can either offer you the strength to get through it or it can interfere and allow you to think of quitting.

Currently, this is where am at.  Every day each one of us fights a battle.  Those battles can be small or they can be big.  Our mind allows us to win those battles, big or small, and our mind also can succumb to the weakness and lose that battle.

At the moment I'm feeling very weak.  Emotionally, I'm on edge and physically, I feel as though my body is deteriorating.  I'm on edge emotionally because of the many physical battles I'm facing right now.  I'm not sure what is actually going on.  If it's stress related due to the hustle and bustle of the holidays or if its something else going on.  I question the stress because of knowing of a little warrior princess who was experiencing many symptoms over the holidays that led to her diagnosis and relapses.  Thank God all her blood results are normal and she is being monitored closely.  This leads me to my current status.  Over the holidays, which includes Thanksgiving to after New Year's, I have been experiencing some 'gvhd' symptoms that I haven't experienced in awhile.  I have been having nauseous mornings and I have been feeling run down and extremely tired.  I continue to battle with 'gvhd' of the eyes, especially in the evenings.  My eyes become so dry and sensitive that I have to turn off most lights or put them on the lowest setting while wearing sunglasses.  I can say this really is not fun.

I attempted again another workout regimen and yet again I hit another wall.  This time it only took a week.  I have sharp pain shooting through my lower back.  It's becoming so uncomfortable that its beginning to keep me up at night.

Thankfully, I have my oncologist appointment next week.  I'm hoping for positive results and solutions.

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