Monday, June 24, 2013

Once Upon A Time...




Once Upon A Time, four years to be exact, there was a young women whose body was changing.  The changes were not for the better, they were far worse.  She was developing mouth sores, her tastes in foods were changing, her hair was becoming lifeless and dull.  She would go to bed with near flawless skin and wake up to bruises the size of softballs or even larger without any particular incident causing them. She knew deep down that something was wrong and that something was Acute Myeloid Leukemia.

On June 25, 2009, my world completely changed.  My goals were no longer my goals.  My outlook on life was no longer the same.  I had less than 24 hours to make peace with myself and the many people in my life because I wasn't sure if I was going to make it.  I had to prepare my children, who were 6 and 4 at the time, that their mommy was going to be gone for sometime.  I had to explain to them that I would be having long stays in the hospital, sometimes weeks/months at a time, while in isolation.  There were times, I couldn't comfort them with hugs or kisses for fear of becoming sick due to my suppressed and even, at times, non-existent immune system.  All of our lives were uprooted, living between home, hospital and hospital housing that were over two hours apart from each other.  We even celebrated holidays and birthdays in the hospital.

This was just the beginning to our "new beginning".  I wasn't the only one affected.  My family, friends, co-workers, etc. were all affected in some way.  Even though it was a fight and struggle, it taught me so much.

It has taught me to take each day, one day at a time.  It has opened my eyes to the beauty of life.  It has shown me what things are truly important and has made me aware not to worry about the trivial things.  I have learned to stop worrying about the things that can't be controlled because its a waste of energy and time.

I'm still learning what this 'new normal' means. I'm trying to discover what is next in my life's journey.  I certainly know what is my passion.  Now, I just need to figure out how to see it through.

I hope that I have shown others, and especially my children, that we all struggle at some point in time.  Some may struggle more than others.  But those struggles are only temporary and with the right attitude, you can achieve anything you set your mind too.

Image Source: http://calibermag.org/articles/doing-it-for-the-story/


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